I wish I could take credit for this, but sadly, I did not write it myself. Nevertheless, it’s good for a laugh. I think what I find particularly amusing is that you don’t write good, you write well. I’m such a grammar geek!
10 Steps on How to Write Good:
1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. Avoid clichés like the plague. They’re old hat.
4. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
5. Be more or less specific.
6. Writers should never generalize.
Seven: Be Consistent!
8. Don’t be redundant; don’t use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
9. Who needs rhetorical questions?
10. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.